NY Times Shows That Plants Are People Too

When animals have been accorded full human rights and militant veganism is imposed by force of law, will utopia have been achieved? No. There is always one more freedom that must be crushed before we can all be happy forevermore. Once meat and leather are criminal offenses, progressives will move on to plants. The New York Times has already begun to lay the groundwork:

Monica Gagliano says that she has received Yoda-like advice from trees and shrubbery. She recalls being rocked like a baby by the spirit of a fern. She has ridden on the back of an invisible bear conjured by an osha root. She once accidentally bent space and time while playing the ocarina, an ancient wind instrument, in a redwood forest. “Oryngham,” she says, means “thank you” in plant language. These interactions have taken place in dreams, visions, songs and telekinetic interactions, sometimes with the help of shamans or ayahuasca.

Ayahuasca is a hallucinogenic vine that grows in the Amazon.

At this point, you might think Monica Gagliano is a neo-hippy screwball with mental and substance abuse issues. Wrong. She is a scientist — the kind whose whimsical fantasies are approvingly indulged at length by the flagship publication of the liberal establishment.

Currently at the University of Sydney in Australia, she has published a number of studies that support the view that plants are, to some extent, intelligent. Her experiments suggest that they can learn behaviors and remember them. Her work also suggests that plants can “hear” running water and even produce clicking noises, perhaps to communicate.

If past developments are any guide, it won’t take long for moonbats to get from here to shrieking, “Plants Are People Too” as they sabotage the salad bar.

Plants have directly shaped her experiments and career path. In 2012, she says, an oak tree assured her that a risky grant application — proposing research on sound communication in plants — would be successful. “You are here to tell our stories,” the tree told her.

If that can be reported with a straight face in The Paper of Record, moonbattery knows no limits.

Intelligent plants fit into the broader progressive war on human exceptionalism:

Language, for example, doesn’t seem to be limited to humans. Prairie dogs use adjectives (lots of them) and Alston’s singing mice, a species found in Central America, chirp “politely.” Ravens have demonstrated advanced planning, another blow to human exceptionalism, by bartering for food and selecting the best tools for future use.

Liberal dogma decrees that we are no better than animals. Soon it will decree that we are no better than plants.

Plants share nutrients and recognize kin. They communicate with each other. They can count. They can feel you touching them.

Mow your lawn while it is still legal.

Dr Gagliano isn’t alone:

“I’m really interested in the notion of plants as teachers, what we can learn from them as models,” said Robin Wall Kimmerer, an author, botanist and SUNY professor, and a member of the Citizen Potawatomi Nation. “And that comes from my work with indigenous knowledge, because that is a fundamental assumption of indigenous environmental philosophy.”

We won’t be splitting any atoms or putting men on the moon with “indigenous environmental philosophy.” Yet that is the direction that social engineers have decided on.

The plants speak to Dr Kimmerer too.

The problem with talking about these experiences, Dr. Kimmerer said, is that they “are grounded in a cultural context that is so different from Western science that they are easily dismissed.”

When political correctness totally absorbs science, the goal won’t be to find answers that are true. It will be to find answers that defy Eurocentric patriarchal white male know-it-alls who won’t let go of 2 + 2 = 4.

On a tip from Steve T.

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