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Witch’s Gang Of “Goblins” Terrorizing, Sexually Harassing Village

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Ms. Clara Mashoko confessed to the crimes committed by her roving gang of goblins, claiming the weight of the crimes was weighing heavily on her conscience. The goblins, she says, are out of control and more demanding from her than usual, even going so far as to tell reporters that the monsters have begun sexually abusing her.
 
Mashoko, a self-proclaimed witch, told The Sunday Mail that she had been forcibly inducted into witchcraft by her grandmother at a young age, but that in the wake of the last year her spell casting days are drawing to a close.
 
“My life is now a living hell. My goblins are now tormenting me. I am also being haunted by dead people who always appear in my dreams. I am now tired of witchcraft and I am looking for anyone who can assist me to get rid of the goblins as well as extricating me from witchcraft,” she told reporters last week.
 
Someofthe best stories come out of Zimbabwe.  Its like going back to the 13th century.  Not that I dont believe that witches have ‘powers’ per say but im not so sure they have these kinds of powers.  -Mort



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    Total 14 comments
    • splinter

      Goblins and demons are real and they have the power of lies and deceit they come to destroy, as there father the devil is the father of lies and deceit and comes to destroy. The only way out is to ask the Lord for forgiveness then give your life over to JESUS CHRIST as you’re LORD and SAVIOR then seek him every minute of every day. If this comes from you’re heart then Jesus will hear you’re prayers and fill your needs.
      Amen

      • sten

        You desperately need to change your medication :lol:

      • Breadalban

        aye you can’t beat a good goblin, but is it seems there ain’t no good goblin to be had in Zimbabwe, guess where I won’t be going on holiday.

    • Uncle Nobby

      Goblins and Demoms are real, but Jesus is just a made up character, used by the controllers for the past 2000 years to keep the sheep in order. Baaaaaaa :cool:

      • Volcano

        Controllers Huh 2000 year old controllers, Not really the Controllers you speak of are the very Demons you believe are real ….don’t let them control your thoughts…There’s only1 God that can set you Free

        • Breadalban

          Zeus?

    • Laser Guided Loogie

      Shut up. All of you nutters.

      There are no “gods,” “demons,” “goblins,” or “controllers.”

      This woman is mentally ill and her persecutions are the result of her inflamed mind.

      Geez.

      -Ken

      • Binkus

        yay another normal person! howdy chum

        to the others…

        on the subject of religion, if you are too scared to self analyse and accept blame for the species then why not blame god and shout that your invisible chums will save or burn us. much easier huh?

        • Anonymax

          Point wand at goblins,
          shout expelliarmus.

          Job done

      • Breadalban

        My Xbox has controllers

    • Abyssa8

      I completely believe her, and only the Lord can help her. For all of you who do not believe in demons or God for that matter. Go ahead an purchase a Ouiji board and play it, I guarantee you will believe…and you will be begging for help too like this woman.

    • HamBurglar

      Whenever you see a goblin or demon don’t be afraid. They can only hurt you if you believe they can. Just think of Jesus Christ the LORD and SAVIOR. Also they could be extraterrestrials which I’m pretty sure Jesus can’t control so in that case a shotgun might have better results. :idea:

      • Breadalban

        Whenever you see some things that don’t exist think of another thing that doesn’t exist and you’ll be fine.

    • dogface

      I’m plagued by nasty nose goblins myself

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