Read the story here. Advertise at Before It's News here.
Profile image
By ArmageddonProse
Contributor profile | More stories
Story Views
Last hour:
Last 24 hours:

People With Plastic Faces Are Not to Be Trusted

% of readers think this story is Fact. Add your two cents.

Originally published via Armageddon Prose Substack:

“You can’t trust these painted-faced whores,” my colleague and hardened expat in Thailand, Bryan, once crassly admonished me in the context of a particular breed of fast, notoriously seductive and wily Thai women who hunt Western men (by no means representative of all Thai women, who are otherwise lovely), as relayed in my memoir, Broken English Teacher: Notes From Exile — the kind whose faces have been so altered by powders and surgeries and injections that perhaps their own mothers wouldn’t recognize them in uniform.

Bryan turned out to be right on that front, as he was on many others, a lesson I learned the hard way, as have many naïve and starry-eyed farang expats who came before me.

In the same vein, on the domestic front, we turn to South Dakota governess and Trump vice presidential candidate hopeful Kristi Noem, whom you may have caught in the media lately due to a passage in her (ghostwritten) book, No Going Back: The Truth on What’s Wrong with Politics and How We Move America Forward, in which she gleefully described shooting her puppy named Cricket in a gravel pit because she “hated it” before grabbing the family goat, which she said was guilty of smelling bad, and leading it to slaughter WWII-POW-style by the same weapon in the same gravel pit for good measure.

According to the account, which not only appeared in the book but which Noem actually read in her own voice in the audiobook, her grade school-age daughter was delivered home from school on the bus shortly after Cricket had been dispatched from this world, at which point she asked about where her dog had gone.

The chapter with the above animal slaughter anecdote, appropriately titled “Bad Day to be a Goat,” it went over with the public and media the way any non-psychopathic political advisor might have told her it would have, which is not well at all — even taking friendly fire from Fox News.

(She also apparently manufactured out of thin air a Biden-esque tale about “facing down” Kim Jong Un mano-a-womano, an encounter she won because she had experience submitting the “little tyrants” in her Sunday school class. But that’s the kind of mundane lie politicians tell in their memoirs constantly that usually go fully excused. It was the puppy-killing that really did her in.)

Noem ended up cutting her disastrous book tour and VP audition short and returning to South Dakota, by all accounts purged from the VP shortlist for her abysmal political calculations.

So, what went wrong?

It is well-documented, epistemologically, that politicians are disproportionate psychopaths relative to the general population. This is not only palpable fact that anyone not in the K-Hive can see with their own eyes but demonstrable reality.

The Noem entity, guaranteed, decided that bragging about executing her dog would endear her to the MAGA base by making her look like a no-nonsense tough guy with the balls to do the dirt that needs to be done for the greater good.

She also further calculated that she could write off whatever blowback she might get (which probably ended up being much more intense than she anticipated) by denouncing the liberal media class and coastal elites as out-of-touch, effeminate weaklings who don’t appreciate the hard-nosed farm life, who don’t have huevos to shoot a puppy in a gravel pit like John Wayne would have done.  

Extravagant tales of puppy killing is what we get as the result of cynical image-making mixed with a pathological insecurity.

The moral of the story here is the same one Bryan imparted to me years ago.

“There is an idea of a [Kristi Noem], some kind of abstraction, but there is no real me, only an entity, something illusory, and though I can hide my cold gaze and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable: I simply am not there. It is hard for me to make sense on any given level. Myself is fabricated, an aberration. I am a noncontingent human being. My personality is sketchy and unformed, my heartlessness goes deep and is persistent. My conscience, my pity, my hopes disappeared a long time ago (probably at Harvard) if they ever did exist. There are no more barriers to cross. All I have in common with the uncontrollable and the insane, the vicious and the evil, all the mayhem I have caused and my utter indifference toward it, I have now surpassed. I still, though, hold on to one single bleak truth: no one is safe, nothing is redeemed. Yet I am blameless. Each model of human behavior must be assumed to have some validity. Is evil something you are? Or is it something you do? My pain is constant and sharp and I do not hope for a better world for anyone. In fact, I want my pain to be inflicted on others. I want no one to escape. But even after admitting this — and I have countless times, in just about every act I’ve committed — and coming face-to-face with these truths, there is no catharsis. I gain no deeper knowledge about myself, no new understanding can be extracted from my telling. There has been no reason for me to tell you any of this. This confession has meant nothing.”

-Bret Easton Ellis, ‘American Psycho’

Ben Bartee, author of Broken English Teacher: Notes From Exile, is an independent Bangkok-based American journalist with opposable thumbs.

Follow his stuff via Substack. Also, keep tabs via Twitter and Locals.

For hip Armageddon Prose t-shirts, hats, etc., peruse the merch store.

Support always welcome via insta-tip jar.

Before It’s News® is a community of individuals who report on what’s going on around them, from all around the world.

Anyone can join.
Anyone can contribute.
Anyone can become informed about their world.

"United We Stand" Click Here To Create Your Personal Citizen Journalist Account Today, Be Sure To Invite Your Friends.

Humic & Fulvic Liquid Trace Mineral Complex

HerbAnomic’s Humic and Fulvic Liquid Trace Mineral Complex is a revolutionary New Humic and Fulvic Acid Complex designed to support your body at the cellular level. Our product has been thoroughly tested by an ISO/IEC Certified Lab for toxins and Heavy metals as well as for trace mineral content. We KNOW we have NO lead, arsenic, mercury, aluminum etc. in our Formula. This Humic & Fulvic Liquid Trace Mineral complex has high trace levels of naturally occurring Humic and Fulvic Acids as well as high trace levels of Zinc, Iron, Magnesium, Molybdenum, Potassium and more. There is a wide range of up to 70 trace minerals which occur naturally in our Complex at varying levels. We Choose to list the 8 substances which occur in higher trace levels on our supplement panel. We don’t claim a high number of minerals as other Humic and Fulvic Supplements do and leave you to guess which elements you’ll be getting. Order Your Humic Fulvic for Your Family by Clicking on this Link , or the Banner Below.

Our Formula is an exceptional value compared to other Humic Fulvic Minerals because...


It Always Tests at 9.5+ pH

Preservative and Chemical Free

Allergen Free

Comes From a Pure, Unpolluted, Organic Source

Is an Excellent Source for Trace Minerals

Is From Whole, Prehisoric Plant Based Origin Material With Ionic Minerals and Constituents

Highly Conductive/Full of Extra Electrons

Is a Full Spectrum Complex

Our Humic and Fulvic Liquid Trace Mineral Complex has Minerals, Amino Acids, Poly Electrolytes, Phytochemicals, Polyphenols, Bioflavonoids and Trace Vitamins included with the Humic and Fulvic Acid. Our Source material is high in these constituents, where other manufacturers use inferior materials.

Try Our Humic and Fulvic Liquid Trace Mineral Complex today. Order Yours Today by Following This Link.

Report abuse


Your Comments
Question   Razz  Sad   Evil  Exclaim  Smile  Redface  Biggrin  Surprised  Eek   Confused   Cool  LOL   Mad   Twisted  Rolleyes   Wink  Idea  Arrow  Neutral  Cry   Mr. Green

Load more ...




Email this story
Email this story

If you really want to ban this commenter, please write down the reason:

If you really want to disable all recommended stories, click on OK button. After that, you will be redirect to your options page.