My Path: Out of Darkness and into Light

I grew up with Christian parents in a small town in the southeast.  I did not have a troubled childhood, in fact, my life was somewhat normal like any middle class family.  I played baseball, had family cookouts, and went to church frequently.  When I entered middle school, I became more frequently seen at church events, mainly to socialize with girls.  You know, I was just a normal kid who believed that Jesus Christ had died for my sins and I was supposed to spend everyday confessing all the bad things I thought about and acted upon.  Girls and hanging out with my peers at church events were a big part of my life growing up before high school.  I look back on those days in jealousy of how simple life was at those days.  Religion was a big part of my life, and I often remember feeling guilty because of all the emotions running through me during this time of puberty.  I can imagine the guilt someone of that age must go through while dealing with the struggles of acceptance among their peers.  I vividly remember the fear I had that Jesus could come back at any moment to judge and condemn me to a life of hell.  I prayed many nights for God to forgive me of my sins, but I never really felt like I received an answer.  I was a good person and I went to church every Sunday, but I was rather shy as a child.  I wasn’t comfortable talking to other kids or even adults about my conviction for Christianity.  I felt that I was saved and there really wouldn’t be a reason for Jesus to condemn my 11 year old self to a life of everlasting torture.  Hell, the worst thing I’d ever done in my life at that point was steal a lighter from a gas station one time.  I never knew of any other religion and really had no doubts about Christianity or its origin.  I was sheltered from secular opinions, but I still managed to live a normal life with friends who didn’t attend church as frequently as I did.

           But high school started me on a new path.  I worked at a local grocery store with a kid about the same age as myself, named Adam.  We had fun goofing off at a high school job that neither ne of us took seriously.  We got our work done, but we were your typical playful high school kids, until one day when I decided to talk about religion.  I told Adam that I believed Jesus died for my sins and that we all need to repent, which was why I went to church as frequently as I did.  My friend was quick to question why I felt the way I did and even asked if I had a chance to learn about other religions before addressing my strong convictions.  Of course I had not learned about other religions.  Why would I?  I loved Jesus because that was what I’ve been taught my whole life.  That night changed my life forever.  He told me to think about something: The ancient Egyptians were convinced that their Gods were real… the ancient Greeks were convinced their gods were real… Muslims are convinced their God is real… And now I was going to tell him that I was convinced that my God is the true right answer and that everyone who disagrees with me will burn forever in torment?  Lights started turning on in my head that I couldn’t turn off.  Once the seed was planted, it began to grow.  That’s when my new life began…

            For the next several years I examined the Bible more closely.  It was weird looking at a text that I had been reading my whole life, except this time was different.  I wasn’t reading the Bible to confirm my beliefs; I was reading it in search of the truth.  The bible tells me that man and woman originated in the Garden of Eden and ws tempted by a talking serpent.  Science tells me that man evolved over millions of years, as did everything else, which is only a “theory”.  Well, I soon found out that my definition of the word “theory” was quite different than that of science.  For example, gravity is technically a theory according to science.  A theory is a hypothesis validated through repeated tests using the scientific method.  My ignorance was starting to fade.  I began to question the validity of the story of Jesus.  I learned that Constantine was the first Roman Emperor to establish Christianity as the state’s “official” religion.  What I also learned was that the Roman Empire was beginning to fragment itself because of the differing ideologies of the public during that period of time.  There were pagan religions that had very similar attributes to Christianity.  Was there some sort of political purpose for establishing Christianity as the national religion?  Why was Christianity so similar to other religions that technically predated it?  Most Christians would tell you that Ancient religions had been changed in our recent history to undermine Christianity.  But that didn’t make much since to me.  The evidence of Horus having 12 disciples and born of a virgin and performing miracles had been documented through ancient texts, paintings, crafts, and stories for thousands of years that predated Christianity. 

            All this led me to the stars.  Astronomy teaches us that during December 21-25, the sun sits at its lowest point for three days before it begins rising once again.  It also teaches us that the three famous stars on Orion’s Belt points to the sunrise on December 25^th.  The flood story of Noah was literally translated from various stories from cultures all around the world that dates back to thousands of years.  Each story has influenced by that particular culture to relate to that group of people with similar vale systems.  Religion seemed so simple now.  It is nothing but allegory passed down through generations of differing cultures with similar value sets.  Protestants separated from the Catholic Church in the same fashion.  Religion has evolved, just as everything else. 

            I wanted to share my story in hopes to plant a seed to help change someone’s lie forever.  The world is a big place.  Don’t ever feel like you are under the wing of some supernatural force just because someone grew up somewhere with a different value system and set of influences.  If I grew up in Saudi Arabia, I would most likely be Muslim.  Why do people believe in talking snakes and stories of these supernatural forces battling humans?  Why do people believe in some devil running around with a pitchfork?  People ask me what I think happens after death… well, can you remember anything before you were born?  Then its probably not worth worrying about.  We are apart of a system in which energy and matter are constantly recycled through the universe.  Why can’t we focus on real issues, like efficient food production and waste management without harming the earth?  Why do we hate people because they believe in a different tooth fairy than us?  I firmly believe removing religion is the first step in solving our world’s problems.

Thanks