Alien Queen Seeks Help From Earth Acupuncturist To Produce An Heir

The biggest pressure about being a queen of a nation is having the constant public scrutiny that an heir must be produced. That pressure is extremely high when the queen in question is one of the last in a long and ancient royal family of alien kings and queens.

“For the past seven years, the people of the Clu-Choo clan on planet Zebarb have been waiting for an heir”, explained intergalactic researcher, Sara Trisha. “Unfortunately, it appears that the queen has been having extreme difficulty conceiving a child, and the people of Clu-Choo go without an heir.”

In an effort to help produce an heir, the royal court of Clu-Choo traveled to the planet Earth in search of an answer. Fearing that the prescription medication would cause adverse side effects in aliens, the royal court decided to go with a more alternative treatment; acupuncture designed for fertility.

“I was closing up the office after a particularly long day”, said acupuncturist Jim Germ, via Skype interview from Zebarb. “When I turned around there was a group of aliens standing there in a semi-circle waiting for me. They knocked me on the head with some tool or weapon, and when I came to I was 10,000 light years away from Earth.”

The royal court of Clu-Choo decided that an acupuncturist could help the queen on her quest to conceive a child. The royal court believed it could be helpful because alien bodies are very similar to humans, even resorting to alien hormones to help with pregnancies.

“We believe that if we could just spur the queen’s hormone production a little through acupuncture we could have an heir”, said Nugawa, royal advisor to the queen. “It would be a shame to see such a respected royal line disappear because of the queen’s inability to conceive a child.”

Jim Germ has been working for five months with the queen. He administered up to four acupuncture therapy sessions a week in an effort to help with conception of an alien heir. Little change was believed to have happened with the queen, and many people believed the treatment was ineffective. That was until a royal announcement was made on the first week of May.

“After several heir-less year the Her Royal Highness has successful conceived a child”, read the announcement which was broadcast over radio and TV waves to the entire planet of Zebarb. “We anxiously await the birth of a healthy baby girl or boy, and welcome him with open arms. Long Live Her Royal Highness and her heirs.”