The House So Bad I Laughed

Around and around we go!

Yesterday we checked out a house on an acre closer into town– for about $200k. Really too much for the budget we want, but Gerick wanted to check it out. I actually had a bad feeling about the listing and had zero interest but went along for the ride anyways.

When we got there… well…

It was obvious the older home was not as represented in the photos for the listing. It was not in good repair, and overall neglected for many years, it was obvious. The foundations were cracked just for starters. Equally obvious was that whoever had it once was a hoarder who collected vacuums (at least 30), microwaves (over 20), and metallic water carafes (easily over 50). All of it unused and piled. There was much more than that, but most of it was obviously taken out of the house and dumped into the side yard behind the detached garage.

We waited for the realtor to meet us, but then Tad discovered that the front door wasn’t even locked– so we went on in to check things out. It was HORRIFIC. Looked like something out of a teen thriller movie about cannibals or something! The floors were warped, the ceilings were caving in, the whole house was listing to one side, the STAINS on the floors and walls and countertops and tub and and and… Hell, they even built a partial high wooden fence in the FRONT yard to HIDE the JUNK that obviously covered it at one point (you could tell from where there was no grass growing in patterns that the front yard had once been covered in filth like the side yard.)

I thought about the price and just lost it. I started laughing at how bloody awful the whole mess was and began to giggle uncontrollably. The more I saw, the worse I laughed, until tears were pouring from my eyes. Darcy lost it and started laughing just watching me. I know part of it was a little hysterical because it reminded me so much of how I grew up with incredible filth and shitty housing. But the $200,000 asking price just sent me over the edge. Who the HELL could EVER believe that place was worth THAT?

I’m guessing another family member who was also a hoarder. One hoarder died and left it to another I’m thinking. And hoarders have literal brain areas that are damaged that make it nearly impossible for them to assess value! So it makes sense on that level.

But its still messed up and funny.

We left without meeting the realtor. Gerick told our NEW Oregon realtor that the house in question needed condemned and we weren’t even remotely interested.