Pardon My French: Things They Don't Teach You in French Class (Introduction)

I’ve come to realize that taking French classes in other countries (or even
here) is of limited value for those intrepid souls who want to communicate with
actual French people in their native habitat. While there are some very good
systems out there that can help you learn to speak French, almost none of them
tell you that the French themselves have little use for the fancy tenses and
carefully-constructed elocution that populate advanced French textbooks…

…while what you really need to be learning is how to swear.

I believe the Merovingian puts it
best: “swearing in French is like wiping your ass with
silk.”

There: now we’re getting somewhere. And I’m not talking about the artless
sentence-finishers that pass for profanity in English. We’re light-years behind
the French in this respect: they’ve taken the practice of cursing to levels
approached in English only by a few talented rappers and perhaps the
Cohen Brothers.

Anyhow, this needs to be fixed and I’ve got the powder: With this blog post
I officially inaugurate a series of French lessons here at Living in
France, le blog designed not to increase your French grammatical
awareness but your ability to sound smooth, natural, classy and a tad raunchy
all at the same time. So turn off your profanity filters, settle in and keep
your eyes peeled for the next breathtaking installment…

Read more at Living in France, le blog