The Dangers Of Settling For Love

Do you want the truth? Or something beautiful?

Recently I broke up with my boyfriend of four years because
the relationship was going nowhere.  I
was headed left, he was headed right.  I
wanted to be married; he wanted to date. 
I wanted children, he already had children.  I wanted to get out more, he wanted to stay
home.  The relationship was
becoming more of a liability rather than an asset in my life, so I made the
hard decision to leave.  Because I love
him, the decision to walk away wasn’t easy. 
It took me months to build up enough courage and even today I question
whether or not I made the right decision.

Six months out of the relationship, I’m ready to get back on
the dating scene, but there are a few problems.

 Problem No. 1:

 Even though I’m free,
I’m chained.  Love has chained me to this
man mentally, emotionally, and physically. 
When meeting someone, the bad of my “ex” causes the good of the “new man”
to shine.  However, the good of my “ex”
causes the good of the “new man” to never measure up, be incomplete, and to fall
short.  In my attempts to be fair, my “ex”
had so many great qualities, I find myself constantly comparing the two.

Problem No. 2:

 “Why?” lingers in the
back of my mind.  “Why didn’t he want to
marry me?”, “Why couldn’t he see I would make a great wife?”, “Why would he let
the best thing that ever happened to him leave?”  All these questions run through my mind and
it causes me to question myself.   “Am I as good of a woman as I think I am?”, “Am
I not pretty enough?”, “What’s wrong with me?”

So you’re thinking if my “ex” was as good of a man as I say,
maybe I should go back.  I can’t lie, I
wonder the same thing sometimes, but the truth is… going back because he is
good isn’t enough.  In order to be with
him, I would have to settle.  Settle for
not being married, not having kids, not going out, not experiencing life the
way in which I want.  “Settling” truly
means “giving”.  “Giving” up on the
things I truly want.  I would rather “settle”
for being single than “giving” myself to someone whose not willing to give
themselves to me.

Can you handle the truth?