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Describing My (lack of) Profession

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A Writer’s Journey


Now that I’m getting ready to move to a new place and quit my day job, I have a dilemma: when people ask what I do, what will I say?
To understand my position fully, you can check out my post “Why I Don’t Tell People I Write.”  I’ll have no trouble introducing myself as a novelist after I get published. Right now, however, I have to deal with the pep talks, the not-so-subtle scoffs, the patronizing head pats, the bad advice from non-writers, and of course the dreaded question: “What have you published?”
These reactions were rough enough when I had a job. I don’t know how to explain that I’m a full-time non-paid unpublished writer.

I tried telling people I’m still figuring things out, but then they want to know what my degree was in and help me brainstorm possible careers. I considered telling people I’m a homemaker, which is true, but it sounds lame when you don’t have kids. I also thought about saying I’m unemployed, but then people will try to help me find a job and I’ll have to explain that I’m willfully unemployed, which puts me back at square one.

I seriously considered telling people my husband and I want to have kids right away, even though that’s the lamest reason of all. It sounds like I sit at home twiddling my thumbs all day, waiting for my husband to come home and impregnate me.


I decided to tell people the truth: “I’m going to stay home and work on a book I’m trying to get published.” It sounds easy, but every time people ask me what I’m going to do when I get to Hattiesburg, I always chicken out. My gut reaction is always the same: I say, “I don’t know.” Seriously, brain?!? Why?
It’s weird how I feel so inclined to be secretive. I have a guess as to why. You see, I’ve met people who sacrifice everything for a career everyone else knows isn’t going to happen. I remember the sympathetic looks we give such people when they aren’t looking.
Creative people are often delusional. Everybody knows it. Nobody says it.
I don’t want others to see me as the extravagant dreamer who’s headed for disappointment. The one who will eventually realize she wasted years of her life when she could have put her energy into something real.
I can’t make every person I meet read chapters of my book before judging me. I also can’t explain to every person I meet that I’m not wasting my time because getting published is completely beside the point. I’m not giving up my career to do this; this is my career.


A friend of mine is in a similar situation. When people ask her husband where she works, he tells them she doesn’t have a job.


“So she’s a student?” they ask.


“No, she’s not going to school,” he answers.


“She’s a stay at home mom, then?”


“No, we don’t have kids.”


“Is she… disabled?”


“No, she’s fine.”


(Long pause.) “What does your wife do?”


At this point, he looks them in the eye and says, “Whatever she damn well pleases.”


That’s what I should start telling people. It sounds better than “I don’t know.”

I finally bucked up and told someone what I was doing, but only because my husband was staring me down trying to make me stop being modest. I told the man how I hesitate to say I’m a wannabe novelist because I’m afraid people will look at me differently.

“There is nothing wrong with that,” he said, adamantly shaking his head. “You don’t have to answer to anyone but yourself and God.”

I like that.

On A Writers Journey, aspiring novelist Teralyn Rose Pilgrim talks about the excitements and disappointments that go along with her budding career. Currently agents are looking at her historical fiction about Rome’s Vestal Virgins.
teralynpilgrimm.blogspot.com

Read more at A Writer’s Journey


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    • Anonymous

      ‘I’ appears 50 times here. wow.

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