The Strange Universe Of Butterdezillion (Or, All Mimsy Were The Borogoves)

Well, I have been putting this chore off for quite a while. I wanted to write something about Birther Butterdezillion  before, but to be honest, I was  just scared to death to start in on one of her arguments. The few times in the past when I attempted to untangle whatever point she was trying to make,  the effort ended in frustration, tears, and clumps of hair laying about the room.

I finally figured out this was because I was trying to discover where her logic had broken down.  But, that requires that you have some sort of logical trail to follow in the first place. With Butterdezillion, there is no “logic” or “consistency” as we know those concepts here on Planet Earth.  And, I do not mean this in a negative sense.

I am convinced that Butterdezillion’s Mind  partially resides in some other weird dimension where Time, Space, and Causality dance to the beat of different drummers. In her Universe, Alpha does not necessarily precede Omega. If does not precede then,  but instead, follows then. At least sometimes, because if if consistently followed then, then you could develop some sort of system to approach her work.  But for her, patterns seem to come and go randomly.

Much like Einstein back in the day, there are very few people on this Planet who can even conceive of what she is talking about, and most of those are institutionalized. I think when someone tries to follow her arguments, their axon and neurons and synapses begin to reconnect in strange ways never meant for humans. Play her games long enough and weird Lovecraftian shapes, with tentacles, start floating through the walls and ceilings.

Several weeks ago, before I tackled this project, I tried an experiment.  I remembered seeing an old Twilight Zone episode, where a little girl falls through an inter-dimensional hole behind her bed. She can’t find her way back.  Her father can hear her but not find her.  So, he calls a friend, and together they find the hole. However, when the men popped their heads through the hole it was like down was up, and then sideways, and then things moving left were really moving right.  Anyone entering the hole would be lost. So, one of the men tied a rope to the other, and went through the opening.  Her little dog, operating on some instinctual directional impulse, was able to find the child and guide her back to the hole, where  they all got pulled out just before the hole closed up.

This got me to thinking. Sooo,  I borrowed my mother’s  Shih Tzu, Gilbert, and tied a 25 foot electrical cord to his collar and began reading a Butterdezillion blog to him.  I put plugs in my ears so that one of us could stay in this dimension and operate the cord.  I tried to convince Gilbert to poke his nose up against the computer screen, but he did not seem to be interested in this at all. Although he did lick the screen once or twice.  But nothing apparently happened, so I took him home.

The next day my mother called and asked what I had done to Gilbert. She said he started having epileptic seizures and she had to rush him to the vet, who gave her some doggie Valiums.  For the dog, not her. Now whenever Gilbert starts seizing, she pops a half valium in his mouth and he calms right down.  I can’t prove this had anything to do with my experiment, but I do find this indirect confirmation that one should approach Butterdezillion’s writings with respect and caution.

Sooo, I am preparing by drinking some Franzia White Zinfadel wine and two Jager/Red Bull bombs, and then diving in. I figure the liquor will lubricate the axons and synapses so they can more easily slide back into shape when I return. I am also tying one end of the 25 foot electrical cord around my waist and the other end to a very heavy armoire so I can rappel myself back into this dimension.  Sooo, Here Goes!

First, here is Butterdezillion’s latest creation:

http://butterdezillion.files.wordpress.com/2012/09/wheel-of-fortune-v-family-feud-final.pdf

and here is a pdf of it, in case that becomes un-linked or her whole blog slides off into the 11th Dimension:

Butterdezillion’s Wheel Of Fortune v. Family Feud

Now the whole point of her post is that the recent verification of Obama birth certificate information by Hawaiian Alvin Onaka to Arizonian Ken Barnett doesn’t actually verify the information, but instead indirectly confirms that  the birth certificate information is either false or the whole birth certificate is legally invalid.

Here are the 3 documents that Arizona Secretary of State Ken Bennett sent to Hawaii. First is the “Form” request for verification, with 6 blocks of information filled in: (Click on all images to enlarge.)

Next is his Supplemental Request:

And finally, since both Bennett’s and Onaka mention it was attached, a copy of Obama’s birth certificate:

In Response to these three items, Onaka provides:

And, from page 1 of her Internet Article, here is the applicable Hawaiian law on the process of Verification:

§338-14.3 Verification in lieu of a certified copy. (a) Subject to the requirements of section 338-18, the department of health, upon request, shall furnish to any applicant, in lieu of the issuance of a certified copy, a verification of the existence of a certificate and any other information that the applicant provides to be verified relating to the vital event that pertains to the certificate.

(b) A verification shall be considered for all purposes certification that the vital event did occur and that the facts of the event are as stated by the applicant.

Now, to a normal person reading this on Planet earth, it looks like Onaka just verified everything on the long form, which includes everything on the Request for Verification and the Supplemental Request. Additionally, Onaka specifically verifies the 10 pieces of information on the Supplemental Request. Finally, Onaka certifies the facts of the vital event, which were typed in the Request for Verification, and which occur in the exact same fashion on the long form attachment.

According to the law cited by Butterdezillion (b) A verification shall be considered for all purposes certification that the vital event did occur and that the facts of the event are as stated by the applicant.  Well, the applicant was Ken Bennett, and the 6 facts he stated were  (1) Name on Certificate; (2) A block for Sex, Male; (3) Date of Birth; (4) Place of Birth; (5) Father’s Name; and  (6) Mother’s Name.

By her own recital of law, the act of Verification is also certification of the above 6 facts stated by the applicant . Yet, Butterdezillion is neither happy nor convinced. The Verification of Birth, and the certification and verification of the facts of birth, simply do not agree with her preconceived notions.  And what is the source of her discontent???

It is this. Onaka did not specifically list the 6 facts above along with the 10 items on the form Request for Verification. It matters not to her that Onaka certified and verified the whole damn long form, which includes all that information. It matters not that Onaka specifically verified the hospital as the Kapiolani  Maternity and Gynecological Hospital. Perhaps in her wormhole universe, there is another Kapiolani Hospital in Mombasa, Kenya???

It matters not to Butterdezillion that Onaka included 2 more items in his specific verification, those being that a birth certificate is on file showing that Barack Hussein Obama, II was born in Honolulu, Hawaii. And this is really the only fact on the Birth Certificate that matters. Being born in Hawaii makes him a natural born citizen, end of story. Who really cares, as a political matter, who his father is outside of The National Enquirer and World Net Daily???  Finally, it matters not to her that Bennett, the applicant, stated 6 facts in his Request, and got a Verification, and that the:

A verification shall be considered for all purposes certification that the vital event did occur and that the facts of the event are as stated by the applicant.

In Butterdezillion Dimension, not only is this not a verification, instead it is indirect confirmation that the birth certificate is legally invalid. Let’s put on our ropes and slip into her dimension for a moment:

On Wheel of Fortune contestants take turns guessing what letters are in a mystery word or phrase. If a guess is correct, all the tiles having that letter light up, Vanna flips the tiles to show the letters, and the contestant is closer to solving the puzzle.

That’s also how a Hawaii verification of birth works too. An applicant fills out a form, “guessing” the true facts of a person’s birth, and the HI registrar writes back verifying as true whichever “guesses” match what is on a legally-valid record. If the lights don’t go off on a particular “guess” it’s either because it doesn’t match the record or because the record it matches isn’t legally valid so the true birth facts cannot be legally known. The statute does not allow discretion for the Department of Health to simply ignore some items that were requested to be verified (emphasis mine):

Arizona Secretary of State Ken Bennett filled out that web form (Exhibit A, attached at end of this report or all exhibits can be seen here) guessing that Barack Hussein Obama II’s true birth facts are what Obama’s posted birth certificate claims: gender = male; date of birth = Aug 4, 1961; city of birth = Honolulu, HI; island of birth = Oahu; mother = Stanley Ann (Dunham) Obama; father = Barack Hussein Obama.

HI State Registrar Alvin Onaka sent back a letter (Exhibit C) verifying that they have a birth certificate for Obama, but the lights didn’t go off for any of those birth facts Bennett guessed on the application. In an attached additional request (Exhibit B) Bennett asked Onaka to verify that an attached copy of Obama’s posted long-form was a “true and accurate representation of the original record on file”. Onaka wouldn’t verify that either but did verify that the birth facts claimed on the posted long-form matched the birth facts claimed on the original record at the HDOH.

Even though the claims matched, none could be verified as the true facts because the record on file is not legally valid. That is the logical conclusion. Dr. Onaka indirectly confirmed that Obama’s birth record is not legally valid.

Maybe I have been “in” too long, but I get the Wheel of Fortune analogy.  But what happens on Wheel of Fortune when you guess the hidden phrase??? Vanna turns over ALL the letters and YOU WIN!  Bennett got all the facts right, and his prize was THE VERIFICATION.  And just like the law says, [Onaka shall furnish] :

1.a verification of the existence of a certificate; and

2. [verification of] any other information that the applicant provides to be verified relating to the vital event that pertains to the certificate.

First, Bennett gets – 1. verification of the existence of a certificate :

And then, Bennett gets - 2. [verification of] any other information that the applicant provides to be verified relating to the vital event that pertains to the certificate:

So, Bennett got everything he asked for.  He even got verification of everything on the Birth Certificate. I can not understand how Onaka can verify the whole dang long form birth certificate, and Birthers still think that something is fishy. What more could you possibly verify as being consistent with the records???  But I think I know what Butterdezillion expected and how it differed from what Bennett got. Here is what he got:

Here is what Butterdezillion expected;

Darn, is that a Smiley Face??? Anyway, time to leave Butterdezillion Dimension. If I start having seizures, somebody call my mother. I am sure Gilbert will share his stash with me.

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1. The Image. This is a construct made from Edvard Munch’s Ashes, which I found at this website which contains many very beautiful images of Knots In Art. Mathematicians take note!:

http://etacar.put.poznan.pl/piotr.pieranski//KnotsInArt.html

Note 2. All Mimsy Were The Borogoves.  I stumbled across this while researching nonsense language from Alice in Wonderland.  From Wiki:

Mimsy Were the Borogoves” is a science fiction short story by Lewis Padgett (a pseudonym of Henry Kuttner and C. L. Moore) that was originally published in the February 1943 issue of Astounding Science Fiction Magazine.[1] It was judged by the Science Fiction Writers of America to be among the best science fiction stories written prior to 1965 and included in the anthology The Science Fiction Hall of Fame Volume One, 1929-1964. In 2007, it was loosely adapted into a feature-length film titled The Last Mimzy.

Millions of years in the future, a post-human scientist experimenting with a time machine sends two boxes with hastily gathered batches of educational toys into the past. The first arrives in the middle of the twentieth century and the second in the latter part of the nineteenth century. Believing the experiment to be a failure when the machines and test objects fail to return, he discontinues his efforts.

The first box of toys travels back to 1942, and is discovered by a seven-year-old boy, Scott Paradine, who takes it home. The toys include a small transparent cube that visibly manifests the holder’s thoughts; a wire maze puzzle employing a fourth dimension; and a detailed anatomical doll that possesses unfamiliar organs and structures. As Scott and his two-year-old sister Emma play with the toys, the psychology of the two develops in unusual ways.

Although their parents are often preoccupied with their own lives, they suspect an anomaly and become worried. They consult with a child psychologist, Rex Holloway, who quickly recognizes the strangeness of the toys, and suspects their origin to be alien. Holloway surmises that the toys are “educating” the children and introducing an “x factor” into Scott’s and Emma’s thought processes. He believes their developing minds are pliable enough to be profoundly affected by the devices.

The toys rapidly guide the Paradine children to construct a pathway into the dimension where the beings of the future live. At Holloway’s direction their parents take the toys away from them; but the children continue their effort.

You sooo have to read the rest of this!!! It fits right in with the Motif:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mimsy_Were_the_Borogoves