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Henry Makow's Best Quips (Updated)

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(My headstone. Some lines are just intended to shock and get a laugh.

I’m re-posting this for new readers who may appreciate a good line as much as I do.
Let’s get our minds off the coronavirus. We’re driving ourselves crazy. The best resistance is for life to go on. 

A good line is pure gold. I open my vault to you.
 “The conspiracy is like the weather. Everyone talks about it but no one does anything about it.”

Updated from Nov. 23, 2017 and August 11, 2021

by Henry Makow PhD

All that is required for the triumph of evil is for good men to be offered high-paying jobs.  
Prejudice is another word for experience. 

The COVID hoax lockdown disproportionately hurts the industrious and protects the unproductive, i.e. government workers.

Homeopathic dog training. (Whisper the commands under your breath.)


When I attended university, students were told to question authority. Today, students are told to question their gender. 

Feminism harnessed the political power of women who couldn’t get a date on Saturday night (and ensured their ranks swelled.) 

A woman is like a musical instrument.

I don’t have to avoid temptation; temptation avoids me.

indian-massacre.jpgAs an ethnic Jew, I assimilated into the mainstream Christian culture.
It looks like I became a Cherokee in 19th century America.
A man’s religion is his day. (It’s not what you believe; it’s what you do.) 

You have to be good to feel good. 
The law of personalities. Big personalities should marry little personalities.
In choosing a mate, seek someone with lower self-esteem than you.

I looked in vain for someone to believe in me when I wouldn’t believe in myself.
No one believes in people who don’t believe in themselves. We seek from others what we won’t give ourselves.

I am solar-powered. I don’t want to get up on an overcast day. (Fortunately this is no longer a problem. It is sunny every day here in Mexico.)

Referring to my early fame as “Ask Henry” (1961-1964) - Advice to Parents from a Kid, in 40 newspapers:   (YouTube of me on What’s My Line in 1962. Start at 11 min)

I have a great future behind me.

Like Egypt and Greece, I peaked too early. 
We are grains of sand in a Sahara of time.

I am the “Father of Socio-dynamics.” (I wanted to be the “Father of Hygiene” but my son refused to change his name.)

Three laws of socio-dynamics. 1. We are attracted to people who have something we want. 2. We are repulsed by people who want something from us. 3. We are indifferent to people who don’t fall into either category above. Special Fourth Law - We are attracted to people who may have something we may want in the future. 


Attending university “remotely” is like ordering take-out from Hooters.

Life begins with exalted expectations followed by a long, gradual decline until finally,
we meet death with perfect equanimity.

Is someone who admits he is a hypocrite still a hypocrite?
Her best quality was she loved sex.
After making a shipwreck of my life, I am cast up on the shores of old age.
“It was an up-day in the bear market of his mind.” 

The way to impress women – Don’t Try. 

Nothing demystifies women like marriage.

People don’t age so much as ripen and spoil, like bananas.

(l. Lindsay Lohan)

The older I get, the younger I feel. (The Truth does make you free.)

If you live each day like it’s your last, do you still have to clean the house? 

Me: You can’t teach an old dog new tricks.  
Wife: Yes you can, but you’re not a dog.

Teaching was bringing answers to people who had no questions. [They were the wrong answers (I was a socialist) but the observation still applies.]

A professor-evaluation asked, “what is the best thing about Dr. Makow’s class?”  
One girl answered, “Not too early in the morning, and not too late in the afternoon.”
I didn’t leave Canada. Canada left me.


As “Lao Tzu”

The mind is a prison where the soul is tortured by thought. 
The major cause of unhappiness is the pursuit of happiness.

We have a stark choice: Conversion (to God’s service) or endless thankless Diversion

We are slaves to the world inversely to our devotion to God. 
Empty your mind of all thought. What’s left is the real you. (Why do we assume we must think all of the time?) 


c.2022 Henry Makow  (i.e. it’s not plagiarism if you acknowledge the source.)  


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